


Let's Go Fly a Kite

by tmwillson3



Category: Rogue One: A Star Wars Story (2016), Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Nanny, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Military Backstory, Orphans
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-05
Updated: 2019-10-05
Packaged: 2020-11-24 11:48:40
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,172
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20907173
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tmwillson3/pseuds/tmwillson3
Summary: When Jyn and Cassian die unexpectedly, Ben Solo is named as their twins' guardian. However, Ben is unprepared for such a task. Enter Rey.





	Let's Go Fly a Kite

**Author's Note:**

> Flydam House is doing drabbles on Fridays, but my drabble idea got away from me... again. The prompt used was wings. 
> 
> My first thought for wings was that line from a Mary Poppins song, Let's Go Fly a Kite. And so this AU idea came to be. 
> 
> Thanks for putting on this event, Flydam!

"With tuppence for paper and strings, you can have your own set of wings."

The orphaned Andor twins stared up at their once stuffy guardian with wonder in their eyes. Was he actually singing for once?

Was it only two months ago that he wanted to send them to boarding school? Once upon a time, he visited their parents often, the older friend who always let them play and break stuff. When he became their guardian after a terrible freak explosion, he was nothing like before. No more playing outside. No more rockets, sword fights, or bike rides. Even after some time passed, they had bounced back because they were young, but he had not. Eventually, however, they wanted attention.

"Uncle Ben, why won't you play with us?"

After a time, they learned from him. They acted out. They became harder to handle. Uncle Ben was forced to seek help, and the children gave him a list of qualities the nanny should have, which he folded up.

"All you want is to have fun. Your parents had hopes and dreams for you, for an education and more. I won't let you waste yourself or your time. You should live, just as they would've wanted. No, this nanny must be made of stronger stuff, unafraid of anyone in this household. She has to be able to use this list and prove to me why these things will help you learn."

He threw the paper airplane outside as he spoke, and the wind picked up just then. He and the children watched as a light-footed, bubbly woman passing by got hit on the head by it, who exclaimed, "Oi!"

She picked it up and read it before marching to the window, straight to Ben.

"What was the meaning of this?" she asked, glaring at Ben as she waved the paper in front of him. "You do know there are better ways to get a nanny, right?"

"I'm sorry, but that wasn't meant for you," he said coldly with pink cheeks. He folded his arms and looked as forbidding as possible, trying to send her away to prevent more awkwardness.

"Even though your children clearly need it-"

"How do  _ you _ know what they need?" he asked defensively, stomping a foot. 

When his voice raised, hers lowered. "Because I was abandoned as a child. My foster parent treated me poorly, and I was miserable, even violent," she said, stomping a foot to mimic him. I don't want these kids to end up the same way: lonely."

He tried not to think about how lonely he was in that moment. He had lost all contact with his friends since Cassian and Jyn's death, and his hobbies were limited because of the kids.

"Are you going to teach them and keep them in line? Are you even qualified to teach?" he asked, looking her up and down. "You seem young."

"Plenty old enough," she grumbled before digging in her bag and saying more loudly, "I can teach English; I've got references on me. I can start today."

He stumbled over his words. "I haven't even-"

"I don't care. I'm not afraid. I can do everything on this piece of paper, and I need a job," she said, putting out a hand. "Thank you. I'm Rey."

As Ben stood awestruck, the children introduced themselves, and she was settled in by the end of the day. 

"With your feet on the ground, you're a bird in a flight-"

Ben actually sang well. As he held out the green kite in the shape of a Corellian bomber, the same one he, his grandfather, and father had flown in the military, the kids grew excited at having that part of their past brought back. Uncle Poe, Finn, and Ben had all visited the kids growing up, but this was still a new side to him. The kids had  _ never _ heard him sing before, and they were grateful to Rey all the more for that development. 

No one had been prepared for Rey and the changes she would make. She woke with the sun, sang loudly at all hours, and made a game of everything for the kids. Ben loved listening to her sing, but she was far too bouncy and awake at sunrise for his liking. The children hated cleaning up and being told to moderate themselves, but they were more willing when they watched Rey remonstrate Ben for setting a bad example. 

She won over the children much faster than Ben. The more she stood up to Ben for them and won, the more they liked her. 

She started small, with more flexibility in their play and work schedule. Then it was more playtime. Ben wasn't used to people meeting his gloomy mood and growls with smiles and warm questions about how he was doing. He  _ really  _ wasn't used to people telling him he was wrong, but it seemed to be one of Rey's favorite things to do. She fought for the children and had so much experience with it that he almost always gave in. 

It was a few months into her work as a stay-in nanny that she began to eat breakfast with Ben instead of the children.

"Why are you here?" he asked with suspicion. 

"The children are plotting things for our day off. They want to show me all the sights at the beach," she said warmly. "I can't wait."

"You mean you've never gone to the beach, despite living right nearby?" he asked, shocked.

She nodded sadly. "Unkar had a worse iron fist than you. I went once when young, because it was a group activity we were expected to attend. Unkar hates the beach."

"What do you want to do there?" he asked, still skeptical. "Stare at the water? Play in the sand?"

"Oh yes! One day, I want to learn to swim," she said, growing thoughtful. "To be truly free like that-"

"Flying is better," he said. 

"I've never flown or been in the air; what's it like?" she asked, scooting closer and leaning in. "Were you a pilot like their parents?"

All emotion in his face disappeared, and he closed himself off from her once more. "Yes. Excuse me."

Every day for a week after that, she had breakfast with him, trying to ferret out stories about his past life or about the Andors. He didn't budge. It wasn't until she accidentally met Finn and his daughter while out with the kids that she made progress; Finn told her all sorts of stories of how he flew with their whole crew. After that, she went home from the playground with a deeper respect for the silent man who spent his days at home, running his own business, giving her journals and music books, and trying to micromanage the lives of the kids. 

"I met Finn today. He would love to meet up with you, as would Poe. They want your kids to play with theirs again. Did you grow up with Cassian?" she asked after dinner. 

After he verified that the kids were already upstairs, doing homework, he pointed to a chair and motioned for her to sit. Quietly he said, "Yes. Both him and Poe. Our parents all worked together."

"I'm sorry," she said, patting his hand comfortingly. "I had two childhood friends taken from me at a young age; I've been afraid to make friends since."

"Is that why you never ask for time off?" he asked, settling into his chair.

"Yes. My parents abandoned me; everyone has always abandoned me," she said, growing serious. "I don't let that stop me, though, from making the most of life."

As her head dipped down at repeating the familiar words, he barked out, "Rey. Look at me."

Jerking her head up, she was shocked to see him now on the edge of his seat.

"Just because your parents abandon you doesn't mean everyone else will. That's why I'm as close to my crew as I am. My parents were too busy for me; I chose my own family," he said, eyes meeting hers. 

"Then why haven't you talked to any of them in over a year?" she asked.

"Because it hurts too much. I caused this," he said, pulling away.

She nodded and stood up. "Finn doesn't think so. I intend to meet more people in your crew; your children miss their old friends. I'm shocked you don't."

"I do," he said quietly. "I don't deserve them."

Rey looked at him with sympathy before wishing him good night, now sure of her next steps. If her pursuit of quality time for the twins was an uphill battle, then bringing Ben back into the fold was like being in the trenches, a never ending struggle every day. She coaxed. She told him every update about his friends that he wouldn't ask. She pestered him with more questions. 

Little by little, he opened up and asked about his friends, who all knew Rey by that point. She had been made an official member of the crew by Poe and Finn, and she was determined to bring a smile to his face someday. 

It wasn't until the third anniversary of the deaths of Cassian and Jyn that Rey noticed him looking more grim than normal. 

"Ben, do you want to visit their graves while the children play with their crew?" she asked. 

"Why do you care?" he shouted. "You know everything from them. They're your new family. I see how you talk to them."

"They miss you, though," she said, taking his hands. "They're wonderful people, and I'm glad to have them in my life now. But, I'm still temporary. They aren't what's most important to me, though. You are. You're hurting, and I care about you just as much as I do the children. Won't you let me in?"

"I'm a mess," he said, trying to move away. 

"So am I," she said, following. "Ben. I sense the conflict within you. Let me help you."

He looked up at his name, and he finally agreed after a few moments. At the cemetery, Ben held his composure until the names of his friends were readable. Then, he crumpled and knelt on the ground. Rey threaded her arms around him, trying to comfort him. 

For an hour, he stayed that way, defeated. With trembling hands, he pulled her off and sat in the grass. "I did this," he choked out. "I asked him to inspect Snoke's house. If Jyn hadn't picked him up after the house inspection, they wouldn't have died when the home next door blew up. Everything about that man was cursed. I knew this. I did this."

"As I recall, everyone dealt with him as a commander, not just you," reminded Rey. "So he wasn't a good replacement for Poe's later wife. It's not your fault. Cassian chose to go later, not when you asked. Don't beat yourself up over this."

"Too late," he said, covering his eyes.

"Ben."

He looked up, shocked when a hand touched his cheek.

"No one blames you; it's time to forgive yourself and move on. They wouldn't want you to be miserable, nor their kids."

"They weren't! The kids were-"

"Acting out because of you. You want them to live a good life, but how can they when you won't let them do anything fun? How many times were you arrested while in the service?" she asked testily.

"Too many to count, but most of those were Dameron's fault," insisted Ben, lightening up some. "Or Andor's. He always wanted to see the world, to live the good life."

"He would want you to be happy, to enjoy your life as well. He wouldn't blame you for this, either."

"How do you know-"

He stopped when a brown cat suddenly appeared out of nowhere and began rubbing itself against him. He simply stared, transfixed by the sight of the cat. He blinked repeatedly when the cat looked up, showing its white eyes.

"Kaytoo?" he asked, choking up.

The cat purred before stopping and looking up at him expectantly. Rey had no idea what was going on, but she couldn't stop internally laughing when a lightbulb went off in Ben's head, making him scramble to bend over and put his hands together. From there, the overgrown Maine Coon jumped into the cradle of his arms, wanting to be petted.

"Where did you come from?" he asked reverently, petting the cat repeatedly. "How are you still so fat?"

The cat hissed at being called fat, and then went quiet. Ben finally remembered Rey.

"Cassian used to have a cat, Kaytoo. He disappeared right before they died, and we never found him. He's ancient, the best friend of Cassian. He was always loyal."

"He has good taste; he knows the truth, just like Cassian does, that you're a good person," she said, rubbing his arm. "You're not a monster."

To emphasize Rey's words, Kaytoo walked around Ben's broad shoulders and settled himself around his neck, purring contentedly. 

"Cassian would want you to forgive yourself; he's begging you, just like I am," said Rey, standing in front of Ben and placing a hand over his heart. "The past doesn't have to die; it can be let go to live on in our hearts, making us who we are. We just have to learn from it and do the right thing to honor those who came before us."

"I'll be there for you," he murmured with a faraway look. When he came back to himself, he seemed more resolute. He met her gaze and said, "Everything I did, I did for the children. However, I see now that it's been warped. I never mourned like this for them."

"How could you? You had to be strong for the children," she said softly. "But you are just as important. If you are doing things for all the wrong reasons-"

"I was. It was all for control, I'm ashamed to admit," he said, looking down. "I had to deal with it in my own way. I went back to the only thing I was ever good at, work and giving commands with rigid schedules."

"But you don't have to be like that anymore," she said excitedly. "We can start now. We can take this cat home-"

"A pet that will leave cat hair everywhere?" he scoffed, thinking of his pristine home.

"Yes. For your sake and the kids. Let's go," she said, pointing to the exit. "It's time to move on."

At that, Kaytoo jumped off and moved toward the exit. Ben stared a few moments in wonder.

"Cassian really wants me to move on, doesn't he?" asked Ben. 

"Yes," she said, taking his hand. "It's time to start living and enjoying life. Let's do something in honor of him, something he loved, perhaps."

He looked off in the distance as he said, "I have an idea. I'll get supplies for Kaytoo. Can you call the others-"

"Why don't we visit them? They're all together today," she said, revealing what Finn had told her before she left.

He nodded and looked up at the sky. "It's probably better that way. Tomorrow, then."

She didn't understand what he was referring to, but she knew better than to ask about it. Once Kaytoo had a bed, food, and toys, they dropped off the stuff and headed to Finn and Rose's home, where all were gathered. 

"Is that Hux's car?" asked Ben as he parked. "Even he and Phas came? It must be almost everyone."

"It will be everyone very shortly," she said, looking ahead to the reunion. "Are you ready?"

"No. Let's go anyway," he said, getting out.

Rey walked in first, carrying Kaytoo. All the children cheered loudly, but that wasn't what caused the biggest stir in the gathered group. It was seeing Ben for the first time in two years. Rey gave them space to catch up, but eventually, Ben dragged her into the conversation. By the end, the group was laughing and drinking, while the kids all were camping outside. They stayed up long into the night telling stories of Jyn and Cassian. Rey got to witness Ben laugh for the first time, and when he greeted the kids, she saw his first smile. 

Had the day brought only that, she would have been content. However, the next day, Ben insisted on a trip in honor of Cassian, so she went with him. When they ended up at the beach next to a dock, she was surprised. 

"Ben? What are we doing?"

"For the first time in three years, I slept through the night. I forgave myself; I feel free," he said earnestly, going to her. "And it's all because of you. I want to thank you."

"You don't have to-"

"I am, Sweetheart," he said, touching her cheek. "Cassian used to love parasailing. It was our yearly bonding activity among the guys. I want you to share it with me."

Her heartbeat sped up at seeing more of this new side of Ben. She was excited to spend time alone with him, and equally nervous to go above the water. "I've always wanted to fly," she said.

"You will here. You'll never feel so free. One day, I'll take you on my plane … after you're used to this," he said with a smirk. 

"I'm a fast learner," she replied tartly, kicking sand at him before running toward the boat, where a tall, thin man and shorter man awaited. 

"Welcome to Jedha Beach Parasailing. I'm Baze and this is Chirrut," said the short man. "You must be Rey, the girl we've heard so much about."

Soon, Rey was swept up into the enthusiasm both men had in boating and parasailing. Before long, she was wearing a life jacket and hanging on for dear life as the boat skipped across the waters. When they were in position for parasailing, she and Ben put on the necessary gear.

"You ready, Rey?" asked Ben warmly. 

"No," she said, making all laugh.

"Take hold of this moment. The force is strong," said Chirrut, patting Rey's arm encouragingly. 

"In other words, enjoy yourself. Embrace the now," said Baze, used to his friend.

"And hold on," said Ben, grinning as Baze prepared to turn on the boat once more.

Seconds later, they were lifting into the sky, and Rey squealed in delight, taking in all around her. Her right hand clutched Ben's arm in fear, and she shivered when they finally reached their maximum altitude. 

"I'm glad I wore the coat like you suggested. It's chilly up here. But so beautiful," she said in awe. "You saw this every day in flying? How did you ever come down?"

"I had no reason to many days," he said, gazing at her fondly. "Friends were the only reason, really." He paused and continued to look at her until he finally added, "Like you."

"Yes," she said, tentatively letting go to touch his hand. "I would like that."

"Me too," he said, right before the boat picked up speed and jetted ahead. It was hard to speak for a time, the fresh water and wind flying in their faces as the morning sun welcomed them. There was only the open air and a world to explore, side by side. She was truly free, and she had never felt so strong, knowing she was safe and had Ben beside her. 

They spent most of the day on the boat, and by the end, Rey was begging the men for lessons in driving the boat and setting up the equipment for parasailing. 

That day was only the beginning. By degrees, Ben loosened up. He played more with the children. There was less of a schedule. He even began spending time with his friends again, which was how she discovered he could sing, and Rey was always invited to the meetings. Every now and then, Ben even took her on trips to learn more about the Andors. They tried plane jumping, which Rey enjoyed, but her favorite activity was flying with Ben. 

When he showed her his black plane for the first time, his Whisper, she fell in love. The longer she spent in the air with him, the more she realized that she was falling for Ben. He was so confident and sure of himself there, and he made the earth come alive in new ways. It was his special world, and he wanted her to be a part of it. 

It was after their fourth flight that Rey decided that it was time to broach her least favorite topic with Ben.

As they ate dinner together afterwards, she asked, "How much longer should I expect to stay here now that the kids are behaving well and you're better? Should I be looking for another job soon?"

"What? No! What made you think of that?" he asked, annoyed as he leaned in. "Why wouldn't you stay?"

"Because I'm not really needed. The kids see me as …"

She drifted off, afraid to say what she felt after the night before. Ben, however, had no qualms saying what he saw. "A friend and mother. They love you. Why else would they want a kiss on the cheek from you, too?"

"That's what I'm worried about. Should we be encouraging that?" she asked.

It was as much for them as it was for her. She going away would crush the kids, and it would hurt her even more. Leaving either the kids or Ben was liable to break her as it was. She had become attached to both, and her self-preservation instincts were kicking in. 

"No, but do you want to go?" he asked, immediately concerned. 

"No, er yes," she stammered, looking away. 

She was too afraid that if she looked at him, then she would see his hurt when they were next to each other. He said so much with one little twitch of his mouth, from one look. If she saw the right thing, she'd never be able to leave him. She wanted to be wanted for herself, not for her skills. She wanted him to love  _ her _ , but she didn't believe it possible.

"If you do, you can start looking. You're welcome to stay here until you find something else," he said gently. "The kids will be sad to lose you."

She wanted  _ him _ to be sad, not them.

"I know. It breaks my heart to consider leaving them. But I want to do what's best for them," she said. "I don't want them to get attached to me if I'm not staying."

She wanted him to tell her that he wanted her as much as she wanted him. But there was nothing, only an awkward silence. 

"I know. Let's not tell them yet," he said, taking her hand, forcing her to look at him. 

When she did, she saw so many questions in his eyes, tinged with sadness. She wasn't sure what caused it, so she didn't ask. However, as the weeks went by, she found plenty of jobs she liked. She was unable to decide or pick one. 

What worried her, however, was Ben's behavior in the aftermath. He became withdrawn again, and the children worried about him, just as his friends did. After a month of that behavior, he sat both kids down to talk.

"I've been doing a lot of thinking, and I think it's a good idea for you two to go to boarding school. You can see more of the world and meet more people, like I did," said Ben. "You'll be going in the fall."

Both kids were crushed, and Rey was unprepared for the sudden change in events. As soon as the kids were in bed, she cornered Ben.

"What are you thinking?"

"You should ask yourself the same question. You've turned down at least two job offers. Why are you staying?" he asked, emphasizing each word. "I'm trying to make this break clean and easy for all involved. Good night."

He was gone in a flash, and he made himself even more unavailable and withdrawn. When his friends heard the news, they waited to see if he would change his mind. When he didn't after a month, they took matters into their own hands. Two sets of people talked to Ben and Rey. Rose, Poe, and Holdo sat down with her.

"What's going on, Rey? What caused this?"

"It's my fault," she said, starting to tear up. "The kids are starting to become really attached to me, so I was worried if I should stay. I asked to start looking at other jobs; that was when he became withdrawn. Now he's gone too far! Who is he helping? Certainly not the kids."

"He said it was to help you, didn't he?" said Poe.

She nodded.

"That's like him to do that. It's for one of two reasons: either he genuinely wants you to find better work, or he's protecting his heart from being hurt by you. I'm inclined to say it's the latter," said Poe. "He likes you a lot."

"I like him, too," admitted Rey. "I've never met anyone like him. But I don't want just some vague liking-"

"You love him, don't you?" asked Rose.

Rey sniffed and nodded. "If I knew how he felt-"

"Then ask him! Tell him how you feel," urged Amilyn. "Don't be afraid."

"He's given no indication-"

"Hardly," scoffed Poe. "He talks about you  _ all  _ the time. He makes things for you. He brags about you to us-"

"Not to mention stares at you when you're close by," giggled Rose.

"He watched all of us get married. He always looked so alone and lost at all our weddings. The rocky marriage of his parents has kept him away from most, but he's let you in," explained Poe.

"He loves you," said Holdo. "Tell him."

Rey didn't know what Finn, Hux, and Phasma told Ben, but it produced no visible change at first. There was only more of the same, but with more long glances shared. 

"With your fist holding tight to the string of your kite. Oh, oh, oh!"

Rey had always been one to have her feet firmly planted in reality. She held on tight to what she had and did not like to deviate or risk her heart. However, the time had come to let the kite free, to let it soar, and it was time to do the same with the heart she so carefully guarded. When she had enough of their dancing around one another, not to mention the mopey faces of the twins, she left the kids at Poe's house for the night, which surprised Ben when he came back from shopping. 

"Where are they?" he asked, looking around. 

"With Poe. We need to talk," she said, sitting on the couch.

"Have you accepted another job?" he asked, still standing.

"Do you want me to?" she asked, motioning for him to sit. 

"No, er yes. Shouldn't I?" he asked, rubbing the back of his neck as he paced nervously. 

She knew that motion. He did it when he was embarrassed. She had a job in mind, a smaller one, and if he was conflicted, then maybe they could date. 

"Ben, do you ever wonder why I ask for journals and music books?"

"To practice with the children?" he suggested, sitting down.

"Yes and no. I encourage them to journal and write, but I also do it for myself. It's why I studied music and Englsih for teaching, so I could get lost in it when my world was terrible. I want others to have that ability that I did, especially when they're in worse places than me." 

He nodded, trying to understand but not really. 

"Music brings me joy, just as writing does. I never thought my life would be so happy that I didn't need to escape. Here with you, though, I've felt that joy every day. I've loved every second in this house with you," she said honestly. 

Ben opened and closed his mouth, unable to speak. When he continued not to speak, she feared she had overstepped and imagined it all. She started to pull away, only for Ben to snatch her wrist.

"I don't want you to leave," he said. "You're the best thing that's ever happened to me, besides the kids. I'd miss you."

She wasn't ready for that admission, and based on the way he flattened his lips, he hadn't expected those words to tumble out of his mouth either. 

It gave her hope; her heart soared a little higher, reaching out to his. She took his hand. "What are you suggesting?"

"I, that is, you-"

He was adorable when he blushed and gesticulated wildly. It gave her the courage to step out on a branch and take the jump.

She kissed him, and together, they free-falled into another plane of joy. This type of fall, though, was different. To know that they were wanted - desperately if the way they clasped and grabbed on to one another was any indication - made the fall feel as though they had wings for the best kind of flying, free to go wherever.

They talked and kissed through the night, and right before they picked up the kids, Ben bought a large number of kites. 

"Why do we need so many?" she asked as she carried a bunch.

"Follow my lead. We're going to break this news properly and celebrate at the beach," he said as he picked up peanut butter and jelly sandwich supplies. 

When they arrived at Poe's house, all were shocked to see Ben smiling and in a good mood. The kids ran ahead.

"Uncle Ben! What's going on?"

"You're not going to boarding school anymore. That place was boring when I went, and you have good friends here," he said, kneeling amidst much cheering and hugs from the twins.

"Anything else?" asked Poe, making Ben give him a withering look. 

"Yes," he said, turning back to his adopted kids. "Rey's nor going to work for me anymore. She's getting a new job."

"Why? Why can't she stay?" asked the little girl.

"She  _ is  _ staying. She's just not going to be paid for it anymore," he said, glancing at Rey. "Rey's dating me now."

"When are you getting married?" asked the twin brother.

Both Ben and Rey blushed before Ben changed the subject.

"How would you like to go to the beach? Would everyone like to go?"

As enthusiastic screams of assent filled the house, Ben motioned to Rey, who showed off the kites he bought. That was when he began to sing a song from the kids' current favorite movie.

All the children marveled at his singing, and then Rey joined in. Finn and Rose's little girl joined next, followed by Poe and Amilyn's son. It wasn't long before others did as well. 

"Oh let's go fly a kite!" 

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading!


End file.
